Cyborg's Guide to Scoring With Chicks
by Iceliena
Summary: After discovering that the leader of the Titans is still inexperienced after dating Starfire for over an entire year, Cyborg decides to give him advice to amp up his relationship, along with assisting Beast Boy into finally "getting some".


**Cyborg's Guide to Scoring With Chicks**

**Description: **After discovering that the leader of the Titans is still inexperienced after dating Starfire for over an entire year, Cyborg decides to give him advice to amp up his relationship, along with assisting Beast Boy into finally "getting some".

**Parings:** Obvious paring is obvious. As for who Beast Boy may end up paired with...well, it's not fun if I tell.

**Rating Details: **If this story does or does not get to the point where I raise it to an M rating, it will _not _be an uber hot sexed-up lemon party, as the title may suggest. This isn't a porno, so if that's what you want, go elsewhere. If any of the characters do have sex, it'll probably be a fumbling fail-fest.**  
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**Disclaimer: **Are disclaimers even necessary, really? If I owned _Teen Titans_, why would I be writing fanfiction? So yeah, obviously, don't own it. Not a shocker.

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There is no disguise that can for long conceal love where it exists or simulate it where it does not.

**-Francois De La Rochefoucauld**

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Robin's morning was off to an abhorrent start. After asking his girlfriend if she would like to do anything together today, she turned him down, saying that she had "already have had made the plans with friend Raven." He had been hearing the same thing from her almost every day for the past two weeks. She was still upset after the incident, he knew she had to be, and her way of hiding it from him was to just avoid him completely. Thus, the boy wonder's mood increasingly became more bitter with each passing day, and his pleas for Starfire to spend time with him become more desperate each time he asked. _"Starfire, wanna go out for lunch?" "Star, would you like to go shopping?" "Hey, how does going to the zoo sound?" "_Sparkle Bunny II _is premiering tonight downtown. You interested?"_

That desperate.

He missed her. A lot.

To make matters even worse, his conversation with Cyborg and Beast Boy over breakfast had somehow strayed far off topic from the new _Car Chaser X-Treme _video game Beast Boy had recently picked up from the electronics store. Cyborg was no longer discussing the "sweet rides" that were featured in the game-which, he argued, were nothing compared to the T-Car-but was now asking questions on Robin's own sex life. Needless to say, he was very red in the face and uncomfortable.

"_What do you mean you haven't '_done anything'?"

"Dude, you guys have been going out for over a year, _what is wrong with you_?"

"Man are you _gay_?"

"Well he does wear tights…"

"Enough guys, I get it," Robin bitterly informed his friends as they stood before him, rambling on about his own celibacy. Cyborg and Beast Boy still continued to stare at him as if he just told them that Batman was coming.

"Now, when you say you haven't done _anything_, do you mean like, you haven't even like…_touched her_?" Cyborg questioned, the last part a whisper incase the girl mentioned happened to walk into the room at that moment. He could not see how Robin and Starfire had not participated in any sort of physical activity aside from chaste kisses and hugs. It seemed impossible.

"Not in an…indecent way," Robin responded. Beast Boy raised his eyebrows.

"Have you even made out?" the changeling vociferated. Robin tugged at the collar of his cape; the situation was getting increasingly more awkward by the second.

"Maybe…once or twice." The masked boy sheepishly looked away. He felt so uncomfortable revealing the details about-or lack of-his relationship with Starfire.

"That's pathetic man." Beast Boy shook his head, disgraced with his leader's lack of action. Robin glared back in return, but due to his mask covered eyes, his green friend was clueless.

"Hey little man, don't pick on poor Robbie here too much. I doubt that you've ever gotten laid either. Chicks don't exactly dig a green penis," the cybernetic titan quipped at Beast Boy, who was quick to respond.

"Do you even _have_ a penis?"

"Well of course. I am half human after all. What you see clearly doesn't make up anywhere near a half of me." Cyborg grinned cockily, and Robin brought his palm up to his face, disturbed. He did not enjoy thinking of his friend's manhood. Beast Boy, on the other hand, was laughing with disbelief. "What, do you need to see for yourself? It's right here!" Cyborg reached down towards a compartment at the bottom of his metal torso.

"Cyborg I _really _don't need to see your penis!" Robin blurted out faster than anything he had ever said before, and Cyborg chuckled.

"Exactly. You guys couldn't handle one like mine." Beast Boy rolled his eyes. "But that's not important right now anyway. What _is,_ is I need to help you two get laid!"

"_What?_"

"You heard me. Robin, you and Star have been going out for so long, and you haven't even gotten a glimpse of some titties!" Robin didn't feel the need to correct him on his comment, but thought back fondly for a moment. He had seen them once, but she did not intend for there to be any sexual implications. Which was not to mean that his mind was completely void of any sort of lascivious thought when it had happened. "And Beast Boy, you've gotta step up your game. You're always braggin' that you get all of the ladies, but I have yet to see you strolling in here with one on your arm. Rob's probably gotten more action than you! But my expertise can help both of you so that you'll be getting some in no time."

"I, don't really _want_ to-" Robin was cut off mid-sentence by his friends both shouting "WHAT?" at him in unison. He shook his head. "I don't well…need to do that to be happy with my relationship. Starfire and I haven't ever even _talked _about it. For all I know it might not even be possible… And even if she told me that she wanted to, I don't think I'm ready for that. You really have to open yourself up to the other person and I'm not really-"

"Robin, you do love her, right?" Cyborg's tone had become more serious. He knew Robin was far from an open book, but he thought that with Starfire things would be different. She could pull their leader away from his work and cause him to lose his usually stoic demeanor to cuddle and laugh with her. Raven hinted once that the alien princess even knew Robin's first name, one of the many things that was kept a secret from his teammates. How could being open with _her _be a problem with him after so long?

The masked hero's shoulders slumped after hearing Cyborg's question. That was the last thing he wanted to think about considering what was going on in his relationship at the moment.

"I'm…not sure. She told me she loves me once, and I just froze." Robin closed his eyes, the guilt he had previously felt settling back in. "How do you answer to that if you just _don't know_?" He hadn't. "I couldn't tell her _'Sorry Star, I don't know what I feel for you right now, ask again later.'_ And there's no way I would've just told her I loved her back to just to make her happy…" He sighed. When it had happened two weeks ago, he felt like a terrible person then; remembering it again had just made him feel worse…

_He laid on his bed, hands behind his head, looking up at his ceiling. A bouquet of flowers sat atop his bedside table, a present for his girlfriend. They had been dating for a year to the day, and, not ever having to give an anniversary girl before, flowers were his best bet.. He knew she would like whatever he had gotten for her, and he at least had made the effort to get a bouquet that contained lilies, which he knew were her favorite. He glanced over towards his clock, which read 10:59 A.M. His girlfriend was to arrive in the upcoming minute._

_As soon as he heard a tap on his door, he shot up from the bed, grabbed the flowers, and walked briskly to his doorway. He took a deep breath, and hoped he would refrain from any cumbersome behavior while greeting his girlfriend. He was far from being smooth when it came to romance._

_The second he had opened the door, a set of tanned, slender arms threw themselves around his neck, with the weight of the body from which they belonged pressed up against his own. He laughed nervously and wrapped his arms around his girlfriend, pulling her closer. "Happy anniversary Robin," she whispered into his ear, before nuzzling her face into his neck. He smiled and pulled back from their hug, holding out the flowers to her._

"_I…I got you these. Y'know, as a present, for our anniversary and all…" he informed her. Far from smooth. His girlfriend beamed and grabbed the bouquet from his hands, bringing it to her face to take in their smell._

"_Oh Robin, thank you, this is most kind! I feel as if you have done the _shining-out _of me with such a wonderful gift. The one I have gotten for you can not compare to yours; these are beautiful," she gushed, pulling her boyfriend back into a tight hug._

"_So are you," he whispered to her. Much smoother. "Come inside Star, I'd rather not have Beast Boy come walk by and tease us." He led her into his bedroom by her hand, and sat down on his bed, motioning for her to join him. She floated over and crossed her legs up on top of the firm mattress, her body facing his. He shifted his body so that it was parallel to her own, afterwards reaching over to grab her hands. The corners of her lips upturned as she watched his fingers interlock with her own._

"_How will we be spending our day today, Richard?" Starfire asked, using her boyfriend's real name now that they were in the privacy of his bedroom. He released his right hand from her left and rubbed the back of his neck, nervousness setting back in. He did not want to make it appear that he had lacked to think things through._

"_Well, I thought that maybe we could just spend some time at the tower for a bit, then go out and get lunch. I have a certain place in mind if it being a surprise doesn't worry you at all… Afterwards we could go take a walk at the park, since, I know you like the park and all. Unless you'd rather go to the beach, it doesn't matter to me. Whatever you'd like. And at night I figured we'd go over to the boardwalk for a few hours. Of course, if you don't want to do any of these things that's alright, I want to do what you wa-" She pressed her lips up against his own, stopping him from embarrassing himself anymore with his rambling. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her back softly. The kiss was long, yet gentle and innocent. Neither deepened it by probing their tongue at the other's mouth, and hands stayed in modest locations. It was sweet, and he could never admit how much he truly enjoyed it._

_The two went about their plans for the day, which Starfire had agreed to all of. Lunch was at a Japanese restaurant, which he explained was because of the fact that their relationship had began in Tokyo. She had decided on visiting the beach over the park, for they had never done so without the other titans' company. They splashed and swam around in the water for hours until the sun began descending down towards the horizon. After returning to the tower to change into their regular apparel, the couple set off to the boardwalk. They walked down the mile-long stretch of planks, playing the occasional game and going on a few rides. The day had been sprinkled with many quick kisses and embraces, their hands clasped together almost the entire time._

_He felt so relaxed as he walked her to her bedroom of the tower once they had retired home for the night. Nothing had ruined his plans to make the day wonderful for Starfire. No criminals. No accidents to attend to back at the tower. Not even his occasionally awkward behavior when attempting to impress his girl. Everything had gone perfectly._

"_Oh Robin, I must thank you once again for everything. Today was…amazing. I fear I have not done nearly as much as you have done to celebrate our relationship." She had presented him with his _many _gifts she had for him earlier in the day after they came back from the beach. She had done far more than enough. "This has definitely been one of the most enjoyable days of my lifetime." He grabbed her hand and whispered words of agreement. "Well, I guess I must be getting the rest now, for I need to be fully energized to fight the crime. Goodnight Robin." They kissed briefly, as they did every night before parting ways. Tonight, Starfire's face lingered near his slightly longer than usual._

"_I love you," she whispered and gave his hand a tight squeeze before letting go. She stood back and gazed at her boyfriend, waiting for him to say something. He stood in shock for a moment, before muttering incoherently._

"_Um…I…uh…goodnight Star," he stammered. Her smile faltered and her eyes widened. How could he not love her after they had been together for so long. She had been patient, waiting for him to signal to her that he surely felt as she did. Today she believed that he must, but she now had to accept that he did not, and there was no way to deny that fact._

"_Robin…"_

"_I…I have to go."_

_And he ran off._

"You did the right thing Rob." Cyborg probably wouldn't think so if he knew that Robin had ran away after Starfire's admission, but Robin did not want to relive what he had done by telling Cyborg the complete story. " She'll be alright soon, she just needs time. It hurts to know that somebody doesn't care for you how you care for them."

"But I do care for her!"

"I know you do, I know. You've just gotta tell her that. Sit her down and explain that you care about her so much, but you're just not sure about love yet. She'll understand."

"If I can even get her to be around me so that I _can_ explain…"

"Everything'll fine man. In a few days ya'll will be back to cuddlin' up on your bed together."

"And then one thing will lead to another…" Beast Boy piped in suggestively.

"We're not gonna have make-up sex Beast Boy," Robin retorted, glaring at the green team member. He laughed nervously.

"Hehe, well, there's nothing wrong with Cy here helping that to happen in the future, right? And I…guess I could use some pointers. Just, a few. I'm having a dry spell with the ladies right now."

"A sixteen-year-long dry spell?"

"Don't get testy now Rob," Cyborg cut in. "BB here knows what's up, one of you two little dudes has gotta score sometime soon. We need to spice things up around here." He laughed. "C'mon man, can you honestly say that no part of you at all wants to have sex? Or even just a little bit of fooling around?"

"Well…I guess."

"Now that's what I'm talkin' about!" Cyborg proudly tossed an arm around the shoulders of both of the boys. "Now, here's what you guys have to do…"

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**A/N: **Idea came into my head. I had to do it. Hate my life lol. _Hopefully_ I can keep up with this. Senior year shouldn't be too demanding or anything. But in no way is this going to have like a standard update day or anything. I'll just write whenever and upload when I finish.

But anyways, the Titan fanverse needs more Cyborg love. Personally I'm no big fan, but almost every other fanfic gives him like, one line. About food. So having him fueling the story felt like a good idea, since without Cyborg, this story wouldn't happen. Honestly, I think _Raven_ is going to be the Titan with the smallest part here.

And that little tidbit where Robin doesn't correct Cyborg when he makes the comment about "titties"... It's just a little one-shot idea. Maybe I'll type it up soon lol.

Enjoy, I guess lol.


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